For reasons that remain a mystery to me, members of Conservative Inc are fans of bitter, demented lesbian, Sally Kohn. Lesbianism, up until very recent, was assumed to be a mental disorder, even if male homosexuality was, in fact, biological. The reason is male homosexuality makes some sense evolutionarily. All of the normal traits are there, but pointing in the wrong direction. The male urge is to copulate with as many mates as possible to increase his odds of passing on his DNA. Bad wiring or brain damage could easily explain why those traits point south when they should point north.

Female homosexuality makes no sense, which is why genetics was ruled out long before the question for the “gay gene” came up short. When you rule out genetics, you’re left with some unpleasing options, one of which is mental illness. Five minutes watching Rachel Maddow leads one to think mental illness is the winner. Her weird array of ticks are familiar to anyone who has been around the mentally ill. Greg Cochran’s “gay germ” theory could very well be correct, but that’s all speculation. The current orthodoxy demands we say it is biology and go no further.

As I’m typing this, it occurs to me that the most popular professional lesbians are little Jewish girls. Maybe it is a form of “Shiksa Fever.” I don’t know. I do know that no one would give a damn about Sally Kohn if she did not look like the guy who sealed my driveway. If she looked like any of the news bunnies on TV, she would be doing production work at CNN hoping to bag a husband. Instead she plays the flannel and comfortable shoes bit into a prominent place in the Cult of Modern Liberalism. She even gave a TED Talk!

Anyway, Jonah Goldberg tweeted this out.

Suddenly, Republicans like birth control. Or at least that’s the conclusion they would like you to draw based on a recent spate of GOP candidates announcing their support for making birth control pills available over the counter. But the truth is Republicans remain as committed as ever to restricting the reproductive freedom of poor and middle-class women while advancing the freedom of corporations.

Maybe it is deliberate craziness, but it is a whole lot of crazy packed into the first paragraph. First off, no one cares about free birth control pills. They are so cheap they may as well be free. The hand full of crotch warriors making a fuss this election cycle just seem like old perverts to most people. The last sentence is the sort of thing you would expect from someone who just took a blow to the head. The phrase “reproductive freedom” is nonsensical. No one is being forced to bear children or even encouraged to do so. That’s why fertility rates have plummeted.

In recent elections, Republican political candidates have of course been hurt by their own extremist stances on opposing the contraception mandate in Obamacare, restricting abortion, and generally perpetuating the war on women. The rhetoric of recent candidates like Todd Akin hasn’t exactly helped, either.

But now, a few GOPers have advanced a clever counter-narrative. Recently, four Republican candidates in tough Senate races—Cory Garner in Colorado, Ed Gillespie in Virginia, Mike McFadden in Minnesota, and Thom Tillis in North Carolina—in effect tried to declare to voters, “We support birth control so much we want women to be able to get it over-the-counter!” Sounds great. Especially coming from Republicans. If only it were true.

This is the sort of paranoid ranting that leads me back to the mental health explanation. Lesbians have extraordinarily high rates of substance abuse. In order to write the above paragraphs, you have to be either drunk, high or crazy. The Lunatics demanding I buy rubbers for upper middle-class coeds wanted an excuse to justify the deeply unpopular health care plan passed by their cult. It was never serious and no one ever thought it was serious. Rubbers and birth control pills are so cheap they may as well be free.

Reproductive health advocates agree that making birth control available over the counter is a good idea if paired with other essential reforms such as ensuring that insurance plans will cover birth control without a prescription. Without these reforms, say advocates, the reality is that access to contraception wouldn’t really expand and in fact would likely be reduced.

Sally Kohn is nutty as a fruitcake, but the error above is common with her cult. Insurance covers unexpected financial calamities. What Kohn and The Cult describe is lay-a-way. You pay a little each month for some known expense in the future. That’s not insurance and it is why covering rubbers is more than a bit kooky.

It also reveals something else about The Cult. They have a mythology that would rival what the Nazis cooked up about the Aryan race. The Cult is convinced health care is an unlimited resource. The insurance companies and government (all controlled by The Cult) guard that resource like a dragon guarding its lair. If only the brave warriors of The Cult can slay the dragons, the people will be bathed in all the health care they need!

It’s an amazing bit of madness. Maybe that’s why Erik Rush called her an obnoxious maladjusted lesbian.