I’ve often made sport of soccer even though I like watching some of it. I’ll watch the World Cup and the Olympics. The rest is of no interest as the American soccer league is awful and only douche bags in America watch Premiere League. Obviously this is an American thing but every liberal lunatic in the US likes soccer or at least pretends to like soccer. If you see an America wearing a soccer jersey, punch him in the face, he will know why.

Anyway, I have been watching the women’s World Cup. Unlike women’s basketball, you can watch women’s soccer. Basketball is a sport that relies on speed, quickness and agility. Women’s games look like the local YMCA league for middle aged fat guys. Soccer is a game of passing and ball skills so the women can do most of the things men can do, just a few clicks slower. Since soccer is a slow moving sport, you really don’t notice that the girls need extra time to traverse the field.

Not being in the habit of watching women’s soccer, the first thing that jumps out to me is the number of obvious lesbians playing the game. It is just assumed that women’s sports have a high number of lesbians, but it is not always obvious. Maybe it varies from one sport to the other. In soccer, the players are mostly white so that could be a factor. It may be easier to spot white lesbians than black lesbians.

There’s also the willingness of modern lesbians to advertize their lesbianism. The weird haircuts and clothing have become familiar to everyone. This does seem to be a white girl thing, but I see a few Asians out there with the weird buzz cuts so maybe it is jumping the rail from white to other races.

Watching Japan play Australia yesterday, the number of girls with lantern jaws even on the Japanese side suggests there’s other biological forces at work with lesbians. Alternatively, maybe female players at this level indulge in chemical assistance with their training. The lantern jaw is a well known side effect of female steroid abuse.

If you’re inclined to the nurture side of the nature-nurture debate, soccer is a good example to use in your argument. In America, the relentless pressure on girls to play sports has resulted in high participation rates for girls soccer. SWPL-ville women always stick their girls in soccer as it is all white and safe. Plus, they are convinced it will allow them to sprout a penis, thus making them perfect women. The result is the US is very good at women’s soccer, while we stink at men’s soccer.

Conversely, South America is not very good at women’s soccer, despite being obsessed with the game. They prefer having their women be women so they have very low participation rates for girl’s sports. It is no accident that other authoritarian countries are good at women’s sports. China is great at female sports now. The Soviets used to be dominant. There’s a lesson in that.

The games are OK, even though they are slower. My sample size is small, but it appears that the girls rely much more on the header than the boys. My guess as to why this the case is that you can afford to have a very tall girl on the team without losing team speed. Everyone is slow so if you have a 6’5″ player, you have another weapon. Japan, I think, has a girl who towers over everyone.

As we see with most other sports, women’s soccer suffers from having to play by the men’s rules. The games would be faster and more interesting to male viewers if the field were shorter and the goal taller. The first bit would make it easier to advance the ball, which can take ages in the women’s game. Maybe tinker with the off-sides rule to help with this, but that gets the purest worked up in a lather. Taking some players off the field is another option.

The size of the goal is something no one ever considers, but the number of shots sailing high in these games makes me think there’s an issue there with the girls that is less prominent with men. Perhaps the differences in leg strength or fine motor control are to blame, but a taller goal could address it.

There can be no changes, of course, because that would be admitting that biology is real and the religious authorities will never permit that. A central part of the women’s sports movement is that sex is a social construct. It’s why they never actually use the word “sex” and prefer the incorrect usage of the word “gender” to describe the sexes.