Impractical Magic

Gun grabbers and their enablers in the social sciences are fond of cranking out studies that show high gun ownership correlates to high suicide rates or high murder rates. They collect up some statistics from crime reports and then try to match that up to gun ownership rates or gun laws. Usually there will be some sort of scary heat map showing the bad places in bright red and the good places in a nice color like green or blue. The point of the exercise is to claim that science! is against guns.

One of my favorite gags is to point out to these very serious people posting these claims that their “reasoning” is based on magic. After all, the underlying premise is that the mere presence of a gun causes someone to kill or commit suicide. It’s as if they think people see a gun and are suddenly compelled to shoot themselves or someone else. The shaping of metal and plastic into a gun imbues it with magical powers that seizes the minds of normal men, causing them to go violently crazy.

This sort of magical thinking is so common in the education rackets that no one bothers to notice. The chant, “Diversity is our strength” is just assumed to be true so no one thinks about it. If a school does not have black kids in it, then it is assumed to be an incubator for the Klan. If a school has no white kids in it, the assumption is that the school is a plantation. Only through the right mix of hues can a child magically absorb knowledge.

No one bothers to explain why diversity is good or beneficial. The reason for that is there is no explanation. The “experts” look at numbers on a page and say, “these school have good results while these schools have bad results. The solution is to send the kids from the bad schools to the good schools!” The magic lies in the building as that can be the only explanation, other than racism, of course. Racism is always a good fallback if magic is not a good answer.

Nowhere is magic more obvious than in the topic of race. The other day I did a few riffs on this story about how the sandman is a racist. When considering physical phenomena, the logical place to start is with biology, if it involves living creatures. Otherwise, physics is the place to start. That’s entry level reasoning. Yet, in matters of race, biology is immediately ruled out in favor of mysterious forces that can be quantified with statistics, but only explained with the Ouija Board.

Steve Sailer has been having a lot of fun with the cooing over Raj Chetty’s big project, pointing out the many methodological flaws. In John Derbyshire’s latest transmission from the bunker, he introduces us to a new term that describes what Sailer has been discussing. It is called “Magic Dirt Theory.” The dirt in places like Utah where children do very well possesses special qualities that are lacking in the dirt of places where children do poorly. After all, what other explanation can one draw from this map produced by Raj Chetty?

Magic Dirt Theory is what’s behind the push to export troublesome populations out to the suburbs. Through the use of Section 8 housing vouchers, the oppressed can be sent out into the burbs to live in apartments built on the magic dirt that makes the suburbs so attractive to white people. In no time, those troublesome populations will magically transform into highly productive, self-actualizing citizens, contributing to the wonderfulness of suburban life.

The beauty of Magic Dirt Theory is it reinforces the magic of race. If the whites raise an objection to having their neighbors owning pitbulls or having loud parties on week nights, it is just proof that the horrible bad whites are trying to deny blacks access to the magic dirt. The only solution is to redouble efforts to transplant more blacks into places like Ferguson Missouri. If the magic dirt does not take, then it just shows how powerful the magic of racism really is and why the good thinkers must never quit trying to beat back the bad thinkers.

Magic Dirt Theory. The cause of and cure for all that ails the Progressive mind.

17 thoughts on “Impractical Magic

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  2. I love American Pit Bull Terriers. I have a degree in electronics engineering, a good job, & a nice home in a rural area. If my neighbors’ parties disturb me, they’re really loud, for the sound to carry that far. Fortunately, my neighbors are considerate: neither they nor I hold loud parties (or shooting get-togethers) late at night. Sounds as if you just don’t like good dogs.
    Aside from the unreasonable canine bias, it’s an excellent post.

  3. Clearly, Singapore must be resting on some very, very special dirt in order to develop from a poor backwater in 1960 to a global trading and financial hub with a highly educated population and advanced infrastructure.

    The people and leadership of Singapore has nothing to do with this. It would be interesting to transplant black Africans to Singapore so the they could get enriched by the magical Singaporean dirt. (Also, it’s really a terrible shame that the dirt in Africa is so non-magical, and that’s why Africa is poor.)

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  7. “Magic Dirt Theory is what’s behind the push to export troublesome populations out to the suburbs. ”

    More likely, what’s behind it is a profound dislike and disrespect toward the people traditionally living in the suburbs. But Magic Dirt Theory provides good cover.

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  9. I live in downstate Illinois, where magic dirt is plentiful. We are getting our fair share of diversity, via Section 8 housing. Eastern Illinois University is a hotbed of diversity, as you can tell from the increase in brawls and police calls.

  10. The fact that you can measure a society in fifths is probably itself a sign of health. I doubt that fifths would be of much use in Africa. Or Detroit.

  11. I love that the hot beds of not magic dirt are northeastern Arizona and northwestern New Mexico where the largest reservations are. Curious that.

    Explanations are demanded!

  12. The only solution is to redouble efforts to transplant more blacks into places like Ferguson Missouri.

    If our federal overlords can transplant blacks to the magical whitefields, the next step will be to transplant whites to Detroit, West Baltimore, and other vibrant black communities. The magic that attaches to them will remake the vibrant communities into citadels of order and achievement.

  13. You’ve forgotten the fact that the wizards and witches who distribute Magic Dirt must, however, be removed from it. If a wizard or witch (and upcoming in the States is a special ceremony to choose the next grand wizard or grander witch) resides on Magic Dirt they lose their powers to magically help all others. Thus the wizards and witches live in special secure places behind high walls where there is no Magic Dirt under their feet to taint them.

    Thank goodness our super-duper wizards and witches know this!

  14. Magic dirt, don’t be silly, when we all know it’s a curse!
    Africa? The middle east? All cursed by the pharaohs…

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