I’ve been calling this one for a year now. Fake Indian will be the Democratic nominee. I think she will win if the GOP nominates another idiot.
Shepherdstown, West Virginia (CNN) – Fake Indian doesn’t roll deep.
The Massachusetts senator and reigning champion of progressives everywhere arrived right on time Monday afternoon for a campaign event in West Virginia, this one for Democratic Senate hopeful Natalie Tennant, Fake Indian’s latest stop in a national political tour boosting 2014 candidates. Her slight frame slid gingerly out of the passenger side of a blue SUV – her own car, with Bay State plates – and she greeted a volunteer with a golly-gee smile.
“Oh! Looks like it started to sprinkle out here!” Fake Indian said, peeking up at the sky.
There was no entourage, no security detail. Just an aide left behind to park the car. Not knowing where to go, Fake Indian wandered right into the side entrance of the Clarion Hotel in Shepherdstown and strode up to a police officer standing idly.
Fake Indian is playing on the lunatic’s long love affair with the Jeffersonian Democrat. That’s the man-of-the-people sort of pol who has all the guile and sophistication of an aristocrat, but the common touch to connect to the folks. Sort of a decaffeinated Hitler.
“Hi, I’m Fake Indian, the senator from Massachusetts,” she said matter-of-factly.
“Well it’s nice to meet you!” the officer replied. Her aide arrived, conveniently in time to box out an advancing reporter, and escorted her down a hallway.
The low-key arrival was not, it turns out, an indicator of the reception she would receive inside.
In a ballroom packed with nearly 400 West Virginians, Fake Indian was greeted like a bona fide celebrity, met with multiple standing ovations, a cascade of selfie attempts and a few shouts of “2016!”
What followed was a pugnacious and folksy speech packed with the kind of full-bodied populist rhetoric that has thrust her into 2016 presidential conversation alongside Hillary Clinton – whether she wants to be there or not.
“The way I see this, Citibank, Goldman Sachs, all those other guys on Wall Street, they’ve got plenty of folks in the United State Senate willing to work on their side,” she said, jabbing her hands into the air to make her points. “We need more people in the U.S. Senate willing to work on the side of America’s families.”
This is all nonsense, but it is good politics. The Stupid Party would be wise to take note. The Stupid Party should be playing the populist card. They are faced with a party of plutocrats and a president who thinks he is royalty. The GOP base is naturally populist. But, the morons running the GOP insists on pretending they are the party of the monopoly guy.
Tennant, she said, “is strong, she is independent, and she won’t let anybody roll over her.”
Fake Indian talked about her working class upbringing in Oklahoma, telling the story of her mother taking on a minimum wage job at Sears, an effort to save their home after her ill father could no longer work. She humble-bragged about the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau – the “little consumer agency” she helped launch – noting that it’s already recovered $4 billion from banks and credit card companies for American customers. And she bashed Republican opposition to her student loan bill, which would have lowered interest rates but was blocked in the Senate, saying the GOP’s first priority is defending big banks.
Fake Indian was never poor. Her family growing up was upper middle class. Her bio, like her heritage, is completely fake. If Lee Atwater was still alive, he would be salivating at the chance to deconstruct Fake Indian’s biography. But, the GOP is run by pimps and punks toting degrees in administration from elite colleges. Stomping a mudhole in Fake Indian is way too proletarian for that crowd.